My E.O.G Game Is On!

I think I just level-upped my Early Onset Grumpiness.

Leveled Up?

I dunno which is righter.

No.  Wait.  I know neither is actually acceptable and just give up.

Anyhoo.  

The Silver Fox and I are sitting here in our neighborhood cafe, drinking our coffee and discussing Trump denying he used the phrase “shithole countries” the other day when something happened.

I’d seen this guy walk up with his dog – a young yellow lab, so I was attenuated on The Fox’s behalf since his dog share is also a lab.  The guy ties his dog up street side and comes into the cafe.

I give the guy a look that fails to register, but conveyed my, “You gonna leave your dog outside in the wet while you come in here and eat?”

Anyway, he ordered to go, as it turns out.  He’s standing there waiting for his sandwich and the next thing he or I know his dog is in the street greeting a passerby jaywalker.

With the table he was tethered to.

Now, I saw the guy come into the cafe sans puppy and assumed he had been lashed to one of Portland’s many bike racks.

No, our brainiac tied the dog to a table that is just a lightweight metal legged, wood slat top situation.  Patio furniture, basically.

The dog is enthusiastically greeting this jaywalking lady who is trying to pick the tabletop up out of the street and the dog has completely entangled himself in the leash and tablelegs.  Not that that is dampening the pup’s enthusiasm at all.

The owner finally arrives and handles the dog situation.  

I wonder if the dog knows the woman, explaining the overwhelming excitement of the animal toward her.

She’s now picking up hardware out of the street so cars don’t get screws stuck in their tires.  After she’s collected the attaching screws and whatnot, she carries on her way.

The guy comes in, picks up his sandwich and leaves.

I give him a hard stare as he walks by my window, which he adroitly ignores.

I walk up to our Substitute Barista and ask if the guy said anything to her about the table.  She’d missed the entire thing, helping customers.  Two of whom are standing right by me waiting for food and had seen the entire thing.

Neither of them confirm my account, so Substitute Barista and I go outside to assess.

The guy had set the detached top back on the legs and left the hardware sitting on the window ledge adjacent.

Substitute Barista declares that situation unsafe and I suggest taking the table into the cafe’s storage area.  She agrees, I grab the top and she grabs the legs.  She’s still talking about how could people do something like that.  One of the other witnesses is leaving as we’re coming back into the cafe and holds the door, saying, “Nice timing!” at her helpfulness.

I glare at her in disbelief, still she’s said nothing.

I go back to The Fox and pick up on our conversation, “It’s nice to see the GOP acknowledging that they are likely to lose their majority in Congress.  I just wish they would realize it’s not because incumbents are retiring or resigning so much as it’s their actions that will cause them to lose their majority.”

We went on to discuss the Trumpster Fire’s use of the phrase “shithole countries” some more, specifically how NPR had actually quoted the phrase and not bothered bleeping it.

The point I was making was how the mainstream media and congress have largely stood by and not specifically called out Trump for his bad behavior.  This is how he is able to continually get away with his devolving statesmanship.

No one speaks up.

Much like the two customers standing immediately by the dog owner today.  I watched what happened, stood up, crossed the cafe and narced on the guy who damaged someone else’s property and said nothing.

And why should he, given the example of our country’s leadership?

Well, I saw something and I said something.  

Then I said, “I hope that guy is a regular and you get a chance to call him out.”

Not that I want Substitute Barista involved in a confrontation, but I do think someone should be able to respectfully and safely say, “Hey, that wasn’t cool.”

When the guy walked back by with his dog as I wrote this, I debated going outside and saying something to him.  The Fox kind of talked me out of it, which is good since I may fail the “respectfully” part of the conversation…but I glared at him real good.

My E.O.G Game Is On!

Hippocratic Oafs

I did a little…entertaining at home a few weeks ago, colloquially speaking.  I go downstairs to let my company in and I was kinda caught off guard by my reaction to meeting him in person.

I asked him for ID.

I swear to Cher, this kid looked old enough to know how to do it but in person, too young to do it to.

Whatever filters he was using in his photos really made him look older in pics than he looks in real life.  I have a similar feature on my bathroom mirror.  

I carded him because…well, the law, right?  But also because while I find younger guys physically appealing, I don’t want someone I have to break in.  That’s no fun…ok, it’s still fun, just different since I feel a sense of responsibility if someone entrusts that part of their sexual life experience to me.

<changes dating profile screen names to Mr Robinson>

Kidding.  I deleted my asocial media app profiles.

This guy whips out his passport like this happens all the time.  His passport.  I’m not sure this guy will merit any more of a mention in the blog than this preamble, but he keeps texting me, so who knows.

Ladies and gentlemen, The Brazilian.

PS: He was old enough.  Fucker has awkwardly good genes, though.

Oooooh, sidebar, because that reminds me of a joke about our formerly dumbest president:

During the post-9/11 Gulf War, George Bush was getting his daily briefing in the Oval.  One of his aides mentions that three Brazilian troops had been killed the prior day.  As the aide continues on, W sinks slowly into his chair, prompting the aide to ask if everything is alright.  The president looks up in shock and says, “How many is a brazillion?”

Now, on to the point.

Also a few weeks ago – after The Brazilian, not before! – I was reading the news in bed and came across the HLN news story about the Oklahoma congressman and the 17 year old he’d picked up on Craigslist.  I’d never heard of HLN News, and was appropriately skeptical of the article’s veracity…but I read it.

The married Oklahoma congressman.

The anti-LGBT voting congressman.

The family values touting, bible verse spouting Oklahoma congressman.

And, lastly, the 17 year old male he’d met on Craigslist, I think it’s worth pointing out.

They were smoking weed in an interstate no tell motel before or after whatever else they planned to get up to.

Only thing?  Someone told.

I think it was the kid’s parents that sent the cops to the motel.  And this congressman – this bloated, hypocrite of an upstanding American – answers the door wearing an Ephesians tee shirt with a picture of a sandwich on it.

Standby, I’ll see if I can find a pic.

Ok, feast your eyes on this bullshit:

Lousy jag.

Oh, also, self-hating closeted fag.

He’s in trouble – and should be – but should he be expected to police his CL hookups?

Who knows?  

Should any of us?

I don’t usually scrutinize those I screw too closely…it’s supposed to be fun, but I’ve passed on some…opportunities?  Sure, opportunities that have fallen into my lap and then expressed a desire to remain there.  Younger people are fun.  Still have metabolisms that haven’t betrayed them, body parts that are taut versus not, energy and optimism that can be refreshing.

But they can also be super idiots.

That’s not an appealing trait to me, so it’s fairly easy for me to walk away from just a pretty face.  Call it my “safety” mechanism.

Maybe I have uncommon sense.

He says he didn’t know the guy’s age, but I dunno…seems pretty easy to me to avoid schtupping a 17 year old.

Unless you’re a congressman or judge, it seems.

But here’s the deal, this guy, and in the wake of the #MeToo movement it seems many of his ilk are predisposed to disregard these common sense rules or demonstrate acts of even a sense of common decency.  These are the people forming and shaping our country’s moral fiber.

And they turn out to just be selfish yes men to the special interest backer with the deepest pockets.

And you know what these people and their supporters – even those Americans that are only tacitly so in their silence – produce?

More selfish Americans.

So, while I totally hold this congressman responsible for what he was doing – is it unreasonable to assume that having broken one law, since I don’t think weed is OK in OK, that he would have no qualms about having sex with someone who is underage? – I also hold the kid and his parents accountable.

Just like that little jerk that started the Eagle Crest Fire here in Oregon last summer.

Kids know what they are doing.  I suspect they know right from wrong, too.  The thing is, there doesn’t seem to be a lot of examples of consequences or critical thinking in the lives of these young people to demonstrate an example for them.

There does seem to be plenty examples of selfish Me First behaviors available in our country.

Right now, thanks again to the #MeToo movement, there are examples of people being held accountable in the court of public or popular opinion but not a court of law.

That’s an example, sure…but it’s a little beyond the grasp of our young to hear a story like Kevin Spacey break and then process that.  

Where’s the context they can relate to?

See this world famous person being called to answer for his offenses.

Now, see him disappear from public view forever.

Can our children really understand the concept of having unimaginable wealth?  Just check my adjective for my opinion.  If they can’t imagine having it, how can the concept of losing it be a deterrent?  

Grounding.  Kids understand that restriction of freedom.  Kid Jail, they can extrapolate that and intellectualize prison as a form of punishment.

Unfortunately, as we turn out these Me First little people and let them run unchecked and amok in the world…some are going to find a dangerous path of least resistance and find themselves in figurative or literal interstate no tell motels.  

This kid was lucky…he just ended up in a motel room for a little kissy, sucky, fucky.  That may or may not scar him emotionally. More likely, any trauma he experiences will likely be a factor of his friends figuring out he was the 17 year old.  But that’s still not as bad as if this kid had met the next Dahmer in that motel room.

Real life story.  Shortly after moving back to Portland, I met a guy in a bar.  Ha, suck it, dating apps!  We came back to my place and had some fun.  Went on a couple of DNGN (does nothing, goes nowhere, for you non-Star Trek TNG geeks out there) dates afterward but he was a busy college student and didn’t have the type of time in his life to invest in dating that I want.

Hashtag: meal ticket.

Anyway, on one of our dates, he was talking or oversharing or whatever you want to call it.  He babbled our this story about the time a guy had hit him up on Grindr and offered him $600 to come to his hotel and have sex.  He said that he had needed a new laptop, so he did it.  

In reality, I know he was going on with the usual indictments of asocial media – the guy was married with a family and one of those jags that think the act of getting on an airplane either entitled them to sex or absolves them of any commitments they have at home.

In my mind, I entertained two thoughts:

A) I’d had that ass and it wasn’t worth $600,  I’ve had a lot, honestly, and can’t say any ass is worth more that the cost of dinner and a movie.

B) What the hell kind of laptop are you buying for $600?!?  Not an Apple, that’s a problem.

Oh, and I just thought of a third thought I experienced at the time,

C)  Who thinks this is a good story to tell on a date?  Sometimes I think people are intentionally trying to alienate me…but he did go to the same college as Monica Lewinski.

Boom!  I went full-circle political sex scandal.

Hippocratic Oafs

Repost

You know, I used to write this little blog called AtLeastIHaveAFrigginGlass on blogspot, and my last entry on the 2016 election got me thinking about a post that I wrote there the morning after the 2008 election, resulting in our first African American president.

That there was some bad English…to be clear, the election resulted in the first Black president, not the blog I wrote.  That didn’t swing anything.

That installment of atleastihaveafrigginglass went on longer than I thought but overall contained fewer blog posts than it’s current wordpress incarnation…although a surprising number of them were political, I was surprised to realize once I thought about the prior post today and went looking for this little rant on the abandoned predecessor.

I think it’s likely that the 2016 election cycle will culminate in our country’s first female Commander in Chief, so I started thinking about how it was a second first in a string of firsts…the first African American president and now Hillary.

Or, probably Hillary.

And if not, our first Jewish president.  Right?  He would be, wouldn’t he?  This is exactly why I shouldn’t write about politics, I don’t have that deep dive knowledge to qualify me for the task.  Unlike dating or *dating* 20-somethings…on which I could be a Six Sigma Subject Matter Expert.

And if not our first female or Jewish president, well, our second president made up completely of asshole.

Anyway, it was fun to look at the old blog while I was trying to find my entry on Obama’s win back in 2008.  I’ll have to spend a little more time there over the next couple of weeks…but you know, I’m very busy.

Yeah…that’s a lie.

Repost

Free Thinking Matters

Ok, I’m admittedly riled up here.

I’m pretty sure it’s not strictly me being a grumpy old man relative to a frustrating lunch I had at one of my favorite burritories.

Chrisism.

I paid the standard $2 for a stupid fountain soda and was then given a water sized cup and I asked whether that was right only to be told, “We ran out of the small size”.

Well, give me a large size, then.

“It’s ok, you can fill it up as many times as you want.”

Great, because that’s what I paid $2 for?  To run my legs off between my table and the soda fountain.  Yeah…

And then the guy that ordered after me got served before me.

And some jerk – probably from out of town since he was reading a book with a Powell’s receipt sitting beside it and we were a block from Powell’s – was sitting alone at a six-top table, even though there were four two-tops available.  Hey, buddy, that behavior right there isn’t helping you make five friends.

Oh, and the front door with the handwritten sign that says “Please CLOSE the door behind you” kept getting left open and people lining up ten feet inside of it were not feeling the intent of my glares cast at their back side intended to prompt them to turn around and close the door.

I should probably have my “intent glare” looked at, might be malfunctioning.

So, I kept closing the door.

Pointedly.

To no avail.

But then I watched a guy – who had managed to close the door behind him – stand in line for five minutes with a tag hanging off of the back of his pants.  People pointed it out to their dining companions.  The lady behind him kept looking at it and looking away, embarrassed or uncomfortable…I don’t know which.

But no one told him.

So, I calmly finished my last bite, put my plate in the bus bin, took my squeezy salsa dispenser back to the cooler and refilled my tiny soda cup; pausing on my way by the gentleman to demonstrate to the room that you can actually do something nice without going too far out of your way.  I casually placed a hand on his elbow to get his attention, leaned in and said, “Hey, you broke dipshit, you have a fucking tag from TJMaxx on your fucking trousers”.

Just kidding, I just told him he’d forgotten to remove the price tag from his pants.  Because I’m grumpy, but I’m still nice!  It kind of became apparent to me that as much as I bitch about low-bar-first-world-entitled-white-guy problems, I’m still able to say that I’m part of the solution and not part of the problem because I’ll do something.  Even – and preferably – if it’s just a small gesture to make the world a little better.

Then I glared at everyone else as I left and closed the door behind me.

They didn’t seem to notice.

And then I saw this mess on a friend’s Facebook page and the caption she included with it was,

“Look at her body language.  Look at the way she approaches this person.  Don’t let racist grandma into office.  She does not deserve to be the first ‘female’ president.”

Priceless.

Part of the problem.

But the comments, even more troubled me.

“Frustrating”

“Disappointing” from the Original Poster.

“Her condescending tone and general demeanor in the last couple of encounters she had are so infuriating, it enrages me to no end.”

“She clearly has a particular kind she is working to appeal to.” from the OP again.

“Gross.”

I somehow resisted adding my $.02 on her page, because it’s hers and I don’t want to take over her thread.

And because she’s vocally trans and I can’t use a pronoun on her page without getting called out as a hater.  Notice the quotation marks she uses around the word female in her caption.  I’m pretty much fucked for even trying to talk sense to someone so steeped in their own political issue that they can’t see beyond it…so I made a cowardly retreat to my blog to share my opinion.

Because, that I can do.

Here’s what I tapped out on my phone in my abandoned comment:

Don’t unfriend me here, but I worry you could fall off that high political perch.

People can be a little right and a little wrong in their actions every day much more easily than they can be 100% right or 100% wrong…whether it’s Facebook or politics.

Black Lives Matters seems to be making a habit out of planting slightly naive and camera-sympathetic people in situations like this to manipulate public opinion to their benefit.  They’re nothing more that political streakers or political suicide bombers.  Take you pick.  Don’t allow them to program your view to such an extent that you see only what they want you to see:  mean old racist Hillary being bitchy to some innocent and sweet school kid’s backpack wearing black girl.  Or “girl” or whatever punctuation is preferred with pronouns these days.

Free Thinking Matters.  You’re “frustrated” and “disappointed” and that’s just the point of these types of stunts; not to present any viable alternative, just to unsettle people and create more chasms within the public which – sadly – probably only discourages people from voting since the end result is no candidate is perfect and we’ve all been paralyzed by the realization of the impotence our vote will have in creating a difference.

See the whole candidate picture and not the single issue.  That party-dividing infighting is what gets you Trump as POTUS.  Because BLM sure doesn’t seem to stand behind or with any democratic front runner, do they?  Isn’t that basically a tacit show of support for the other party, then?

Grumpy old Xtopher.

The voice of treason.

Just 250-ish words on what the problem is…in a place it wasn’t appropriate, so I brought it here, where a couple dozen people might see it versus plopping it on her comment thread were all of 500-ish of her friends might see it and form a pack to hunt me down and make me pay for the privilege of my race, gender and birth year.

But here’s the deal, treasonous or not, I think the core of my argument is valid.

I watched a Chelsea Does on Netflix this morning and in it she talked about how our cultural attention span is three minutes.

That’s on a good day.

That’s what’s working against voters these days:  themselves.

We get so worked up about whatever the news or social media tells us to that we almost immediately forget the last thing we got all worked up about.

Bernie.

Hillary.

No, Drumpf.

Wait…is nonstick cookware still bad for us?!?

If we’re lucky, we manage to sink our teeth into what opposes one of our own selfish issues or interests and hang on for three minutes.

The effect it seems to be having isn’t to polarize us around one candidate or the other to the point that it makes a difference, it seems to have just the opposite effect.  The only people really talking about it are the radical fringe elements within the party, not the well-reasoned core.

Maybe that well-reasoned core is like the American middle class…extinct.

Maybe middle-aged white guys will make a comeback as that core.  The people who don’t care about just one thing.  I used to.  My cause was – for a minute – gay rights.  But by the time it had morphed into just Equality, I didn’t have the same passion for it.  I think that’s what happens when you grow up.  You get perspective and lose that naiveté for a single issue as your temperament naturally begins to mellow and you can see a broader picture, maybe even see the news cycle for what it is:  justifying the cost of the Network’s advertising rates.

Now, if you’re a rich old white guy, you employ those naive youngsters with the energy to match their passion and pay them to adopt and protect your passion:  money.

That’s a different story.

But on the sidelines of this particular debate, you have voters watching these special interest groups in some sort of well-informed yet screamingly ignorant battle royale about what’s wrong with every other candidate, not propping their candidate up so much as tearing the other down.  Ignoring the other party to a fair degree and just splintering their own party’s ability to function as a whole.  It’s all about Black Lives Mattering or Trans-Rights or Women’s Reproductive Rights or Obama filling the open SCOTUS seat or whatever.

For once, I find myself thinking, “Don’t focus, people”.

Sadly, the people who lose aren’t the candidates running for office but the country as a whole because then we truly do end up with the inconceivable:

President Donald J Drumpf.

Why?

Because our collective emotional intelligence as a country seems to match our three minute attention span.  We aren’t going to care about voting if it’s not for the candidate we supported.  We fatalistically write the election off as a loss since our efforts to discredit the opposing candidate for our party that we believe that they can’t win or don’t deserve the office, so complete is the candidate-specific fervor and propaganda.  We indict the process and cede the election to the other party just because we’re brats having a fit that can’t see past our own foot stomping, snot streaming into our mouth bawling fit to still act for the greater good.

Ultimately, my comment on the video was just recusing the validity of my own opinion and encouraging people to just vote, regardless of their thoughts on the opposing candidates.  After all, I admit that I’m not the most attentive or best informed or most passionate political observer.  I listen to what the candidates say, look at what they’ve done and then make a decision.  I don’t need a year and a half to make or support my decision.

That’s ridiculous.

This was not the blog entry I intended today…this puts me a little off track for this week’s schedule, but you all know that I’m nothing if not loose with my posting timeline.

 

 

Free Thinking Matters